Slavery

 Slave

        1832

Word spreads through us slaves that it is currently the year 1832. No one knows for sure, some have been counting the days since they've been here, others gave up, supposedly they came on a boat in the year 1825. They tell me stories of their awful time, where there was no room to sit, limited food and water just enough to survive. I was born here on a plantation so I wouldn't know much. We do not know what day it is of what month only that there are dusk and dawn every day. Not like we can enjoy it we are constantly working but that's how it's always been at least for me. I don't know my mother or her name, when I was born I got sold and transferred to another plantation and put in the care of another woman here. I only know so much of my life because the other slaves who have watched me grow tell me, I feel sorry for my friends as they have no clue of their past. My friends always tell me what they look forward to once we are free but can only say so much until they fall asleep tired from the long day of labor. I wonder if their hope for a better life will come true or if it was all a waste of sleep. Sleep is a thing I look foward too everyday, I just want to sleep forever and not deal with the struggle of being me.

Getting up this morning was very difficult but the loud noise of my master's voice and scattering of the rest of the slaves pushed me to my legs. Today I was led cut wood for the masters' fireplace, my body now aches as it does at night once the labor is over although it never really is. I can't wait to let my eyes rest but the loud noise of slashes fills my ears keeping me up. Many of the other slaves couldn't make it back fully and fell to the floor on the way back, nobody helped them. My master kicks them and yells at them to get up. They are now being punished for not resting in the correct place. The sounds remind me of my first time getting whipped, I was preparing his family's dinner table when hot steamy bread was placed down it smelled so good and my stomach was growling without thinking I reached for it and got smacked on the hand before he leads me outside to get punished. Remembering the smell is making me notice my hunger, I am always hungry I never get enough food but I have gotten good at ignoring it. When I was younger I asked why we couldn't sit and eat with my master's family they told me I wasn't allowed to do anything or talk with them, just do what they said. I hear the shuffling of the others dragging their feet, their faces look numb and tired they fall to the floor and I can see their back filled with wounds bright red. I don't have as much hope as my friends that we will be getting a better life.

Some days I feel as if I can't go any longer. I have thought about rebelling multiple times, I am so tired of living like this. I'm angry that my masters family gets to sleep in warm houses and comfortable beds just to relax muscles that don't need resting. They eat all the food they want while we work till we drop just to sleep out in the cold on the hard ground. I have listened to my masters' kid during his lessons and have learned some English. I heard my master talking about rebellions of slaves who have escaped and gotten revenge. Maybe my friends hopes are worth something. I tell them the news and gathered many of their attention, but they are scared. They would rather stay here instead of trying to fight, I'm scared too but its worth a shot if I can find freedom. If others have done than why can't I?

Slave Owner

It has been a nerveracking week. Slaves think that they can start running things now. There have been attacks by groups of them, some of them are even killing their masters. I am worried for my husband, he is out there with the savages everyday. Although of course I have one for me personally she would never do something like that. She would be ungrateful by doing so, I treat her well, I give her a few more food serving than the others and shes working in this beautiful lovely house not out in the sun where my poor husband has to work surrounded by ungrateful slaves. Apart from that we gave her the privlage to stay with her sister who takes care of my sweet little boy. To be entirely truthful her sister could be replaced with someone finer but because I am so generous I let her stay. I never like to think this negativly but I fear my family is in danger, after all they already started acting out breaking tools, refusing to work, one even hanged themselves. What could possibly be next? I pray that the lord will keep us safe.

Today was perfect until some of the slaves provoked my husband. They just could not walk a few more steps to rest. Instead they decided to lay down on the middle of the path, they made my husband punish them just because they could not hold on a little longer. My husband and I were thinking of selling the weak ones and buying freshly new ones who could work three times harder. After all the slow ones will not make enough money instead they just do the work wrong and act like they can not do any more when their past owner clearly says otherwise. He stormed through the house dissapointed that he did not get to watch his tv show but if not punished how will they learn dicipline. To cheer him up I told my slave to prepare a bath for him, as she runs off my husband reminds me of how ungrateful the slaves are. We provide them food and medical and they still refuse. Tomorrow a healer will be stopping by and healing the slaves who have been whipped if they even allow it. While my husband was bathing I said goodnight to my sweet boy who read me a few sentences from his new book to me before we prayed and I tucked him in turning off the lights.

I woke up hopeful today that the day would be better than yesterday. God did not seem to hear my prayers. It started off awfully when my boy was caught learning lessons in front of slaves, I had to teach him why it was so important the slaves must never be around him while he was learning and more importantly that he should only be around his or my slave. The rumors of rebelling have caused me much anxiety for the saftey of my boy. Just after that the healer arrived just to be pushed away by stubborn slaves. To get them on track again we are cutting away food servings from them for a week. Just when the day could not get any worse my infuriating sister called saying she would be coming over to stay a week. My sister and I do not enjoy eachothers presence as she likes to overshare her ridiculous views. She is constantly smothering me with faith and how slavery is a sin. In her eyes they are humans just like us who deserve freedom, which is utterly ridiculous. I will be monitering my sons time with her, I do not want her putting her nonsense in his head.

Abolitionist

My head is pounding as I sip my tea. I pray to god that one day everyone will come to their senses and realise that what they are doing is horrible. Every human being should be given the chance at freedom and the pursuit of happiness as Jefferson likes to say mindlessly. I mourn for those who have had their freedom taken away or have never even been offered the chance to even look at it. They work so hard just to do it again the next day and the day after that and after that and for as long as they live. Slave owners truley think that they are generous to their slaves I would know this because my sister is one of them. I pray for her soul everyday so that she can fix her mistakes and do better, but I sadly start to see the chance of it happening fade as she continues to sit there while her husband tortures the poor people. I plan on visiting her once again to see if I can try to presuade her. 

I lay down on my bed now wondering what the people in the shed are experiancing, whether they are shivering as there muscles ache at every movement. It hurts me to think about the suffering they go through but it keeps me going, it reminds me what I am fighting for everyday. Today I woke up early in the morning determined to make a change, I met up with groups of people with similar veiws as me. I enjoy meeting up with them, they understand me and what I am fighting for, they have the same passion and determination to fight for what is right. After planning where we should protest next a friend meets up with me at a dinner. She handed me this lovely book from Frederick Douglass, he inspires me as he tells his story as a slave. I hope to meet him one day to compliment and thank him for putting his book out for the world to see, it has changed many peoples opinions on slavery which I hope will continue to grow. Although I would love to keep this book in my collection I will try and presure my sister to read it in hopes she can see beyond the invisible line that she thinks makes her different than those in her yard. 

I start packing for my stay at my sisters house including the Frederick Douglass book that I hope she will put to good use and not just burn it in her classy fireplace she loves rambling about. On the phone she did not sound very optimistic about my news of visiting which didn't suprise me much since I have not gotten along with her since she got married and decided to purchase slaves. I do not want to visit or look foward to her shutting me down, in fact I would have a much pleasurable time here in my not so luxurious home. This trip was not supposed to be enjoyable though it was a work trip to keep pushing my sister to understand. It is hard to keep my paitience with her but I remind myself she is just blinded but I know God will help her unblindfold her eyes. I always wonder how the world got this way, when did we make it acceptible to torutre somone and excuse it as dicipline? How many more lines are people willing to cross? I pray we will never find out and that these unhumane terrible things will end so that everyone can be truley free to pursuit happiness.